I can't pick a birthday present...

I have had a really fun weekend. Classes started and I'm quite excited. My professor seems to be excited about teaching and the subject of anatomy and physiology, so that's great. I do better when my professors are excited about their class. After class i ran to Park Street where I was able to witness a union of some friends. From there we went to the reception then headed home to change. We headed to Rt 1 for some fun and adventures... because yes, that's what we do. We go to Rt. 1 to have fun.

We happened to go to Kmart while there. I have been looking for a new duvet and bed set for at least a year. I have also wanted to paint my room. So Marian and I walked around looking at bed sets together. There were a few that I really liked. Despite Marian saying to pick one out for my birthday, I turned down any offer and we went on our merry way.

Today, Crimson, Marian, Sean, John and Chris met up for a brunch that supported the Greater Boston Food Bank. It was lovely. After we went shopping around the Pru. There I noticed that I was very picky about the things I was looking at and considering buying. We later headed downtown to H & M where I found the most wonderful spring coat. I loved it! And despite the price being affordable and Crimson saying she'd get if for my birthday, I said, No.

Crimson and Marian were talking about settling for things and I said, I'm very picky. I always wait because what if something better comes along... and then I had an a ha moment. I am too picky in life. I am crazy about my clothes matching and crazy about not getting something I really want because, what if I find something I love more a little later. Then It's too late, i already choose. Besides my silly idiosyncrasies, I feel as thought this is a bigger issue in my life. Especially when it comes to dating.

First off, I admit that I have been burned before and therefore am extra cautious when it comes to relationships. Yet that doesn't explain why I don't give more people chances at getting to know me or for me getting to know other people. I am shy when it comes to guys I might be interested and very awkward when it comes to guys who like me. I am always wondering, what if there is something better. What if I meet someone who I'm more attracted to?

I think i just need to get out there. Give more people a chance. Now that doesn't mean I'll change over night, but it does mean that I'll give a lot more thought. Maybe I'll buy a jacket, settle on a wall color, choose a duvet cover or maybe even pick a birthday present...

or maybe, I'll go on a date.